black and white

Just got some pictures back that were taken at a shoot with Jack at JEY Photography in May. More later...but this one...this one made me feel too good to not share right away...

if only

If I were an eloquent critic, I'd tell you all about an enchanting evening I spent walking up and down a fragrant woodsy trail at O'Dell Park, following faeries, misguided lovers, and an amusing quarrel between a king and queen. A golf club for a sword, a country club as a backdrop, a cell phone as a calendar but the ass…oh, the ass, he remained the same and did not disappoint. I would also tell you how appreciative I felt during those moments (and still do) to live in a place that has wonderfully solid theatre all year long that is inventive, smart, cheeky and daring and yet somehow remains, one of Maritime's best kept secrets. I wiped away flies, mosquitos and raindrops and, at times, even had to crane my neck to reach around a maple tree for a better view…but can you imagine a better setting to spend and see a Mid Summer Night's Dream?

If I were a fly on the wall, I'd tell you about a charming evening I just spent at a local blogger's house right here in the Tiny Capital. I would tell you that I spent just a few short hours with 5 funny, smart and endearing women who actually think, a lot, and not just about themselves. I would tell you about all of the blogs that were mentioned (most of which I forgot), about the great whoopie pies that were consumed, about the absinthe that was drank and about the stories that were shared. I'd tell you how refreshing it was to discuss issues, people and theory and not once, not even for a moment, feel anything other than accepted. But I'm not a fly and therefore can't tell you much more than this. I can however say, as a girl, not as a fly, that I am more than enamored with every last one of them. Girl crushes formed.

If I were a mommy blogger (which I am not but sometimes tend to lean towards, for shame), I'd write at length and with vivid imagery about how short and long the weekends can be with a busy toddler. I'd tell you about his newfound communication skills (related: should have never taught him the sign for cookie), about the world's fastest emergency trip to the hospital for a rogue bug bite, about the new words which seem to be exploding from his brain every day, about the fact that he imitates EVERY thing we do including our bickering, about the fact that he actively now tries to wrestle with the dogs on the floor (cute but OMG stressful), about the fact that he is testing the limits of defiance in ways that make it hard to take him seriously, about how I melt every time he rests his head on mine, even when these quiet moments last only for a few seconds. But I'm not that kind of blogger…(most days).

If I were a writer with a diet and fitness blog, I'd tell you that the girl is now 30lbs lighter. I still have a long (long) way to go and the fitness component is so much harder than I thought (hi, running program remember me?, what running program?). But that girl, yes that girl, is still 30lbs lighter, and 30lbs closer to happily flying down the mountain at some point soon. I would also tell you that I although I sigh upon looking through my closet because very little properly fits, I do smile when I have to use safety pins to put tucks in my pants and I am positively giddy about wearing a couple of riskier dresses this summer.

There are so many things that I'd tell you…if only this was a different blog.

my place

Last week admidst the chaos of a busy life, I stumbled on a simple question, written black on white, staring out at me from one of my favorite websites …where is your place to be today?

No sooner did I read this question that I got a call from my daycare advising me that The Dude was running a high fever and needed to be sent home for some extra TLC. And the answer was clear. My place, today, was to be home…as a Mom.

So began a little adventure with me and my shadow. We first stopped at the grocery store for popsicles, second went through the Tim Horton’s Drive-Thru for some coffee and Timbits and then we headed home to enjoy the day the best we could.

And despite a pesky fever, it turned out to be an incredible morning. There were rocks to be discovered…




doggie kisses to be stolen…



an inflatable pool to conquer…


or maybe not…


many places to go…


steps to be taken…


And at the end of a couple of hours, there was even time to snuggle…


I was definitely at the right place…

saturday pm - right before bed.

yellow

I woke up on this rainy Friday morning and wondered what she was up to…was she nervous, was she having a hard time swallowing through a ball of emotions in her throat, was she thinking about tonite, was she nervous about that first lap around the track? What will she say when people ask her how her fight is going?

I wonder…yet I also somehow know the answers to those questions. Because I know her. She isn't thinking about any of these things at all. She is thinking about the million things she has to get done today. She is thinking about her doctors' appointments, my grandmother's doctors' appointments, phone messages to return, groceries to buy and where she'll stop to get gas to fill the car. Because I know her. She is thinking about the next time she'll see her grandson and whether she can fit in a quick trip to the Goodwill store to find more treasures that he can play with outside. She is thinking about me, about Felix and about everyone else in her life. She is thinking about the business of living…not the business of dying.

Tonite she and my father will walk for those who can't. They will walk for those who weren't given enough time to walk. They will walk because walking is one of the only productive things they can both do right now.

The sky is grey today…but my mind today is filled with yellow...